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Issue Isn’t “Graying,” It’s Not Enough New Folks

 
Church Wellness

Beware the “graying” of the church – says the common wisdom.

And I confess that I have contributed to that concern. My reasoning has been: as the average age of mainline congregants surges past 60, attracting younger constituents will get harder and harder.

I am reassessing my warning. Age isn’t the issue. A congregation can tilt heavily toward retirees and elderly and be perfectly healthy. A congregation can tilt toward younger folks, from children to young parents, and also be healthy. I admit to a bias toward balance – good representation of all age cohorts under one roof, as it were – because I think we have much to learn from each other.

But that age balance, I now realize, isn’t critical for health. When a preacher looks out and sees gray hair and other signs of age, it’s no cause for panic. The concern isn’t grayness, it’s the empty places between people.

Maybe we should say, beware the “olding” of the church – and not “old” in the sense of elderly, but “old” in the sense of having been around a while, or the opposite of “new.” Churches won’t die from having large elderly segments; they will die from not having enough new members.

It’s simple math. The problem is attrition. Every year some die, some move to be near family, some move to retirement communities, some move for career reasons, some go off to school and the military, and some drift away for a host of reasons. In a typical congregation, 20% of those who start the year with you will be gone by year-end, some ouflow related to aging, some not.

Just to stay even – to start the next year at the same level as you started this year – you need to replace those 20% during the year. For a 300-member church, that means 60 new members just to stay at 300. It takes hard work to attract and retain
60 new members. Most congregations don’t have enough drop-in visitors to support such a replacement cycle. They need to reach beyond their walls and connect with populations they don’t know yet.

Reaching the elderly is no more or less difficult than reaching younger cohorts. If your congregation feels called to a ministry focused on aging, there is no shortage of folks needing that ministry. But doggedly hanging on to your current group and hoping they live forever isn’t a sound strategy.

You want to enlist the active elderly in reaching beyond the walls. Put them to work assessing community needs, ways seniors are being poorly served, anxieties such as financial shortfalls and affordable housing, and opportunities for socialization and community building. Help the elderly to find volunteer roles in town, existing support networks, retirement activities. Some of the elderly will want to start businesses, and you can help them develop good technology and plans. Form small groups.

It won’t be enough just to invite the elderly to Sunday worship. As with younger age cohorts, interest in Sunday worship is far less than you might think it is.

In these ministries, you want to avoid any hint of pitying the elderly, patronizing them, or seeing them as a problem needing solution. See them instead as people with strong capabilities, skills to offer, rich and active lives, maybe lonely but maybe not, maybe anxious about health but maybe not. As with any age cohort, you want to meet people where they are.

Personally, I think churches with land and some financial resources ought to be building affordable housing for seniors right next to their sanctuaries.

Again, the issue isn’t “grayness.” The issue is newness vs. oldness. Not enough newness – in the sense I am using it – will sink your ship.
 

About the Author

Tom Ehrich is a writer, church consultant and Episcopal priest based in New York. He is the publisher of Fresh Day online magazine, author of On a Journey and two national newspaper columns. His website is Church Wellness – Morning Walk Media

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