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Why we don’t embrace change (in our spiritual-religious-faith practice)

Embrace change in your spiritual life.

This is spiritual application of Theory of Constraints expert Eli Goldratt’s work on change.
Please email me if you have questions or want me to help you in applying it to your spiritual-religious life.


While we might work really hard to control reality and predict what will happen to keep us from having to deal with change, the bottom line is that we all have to deal with uncertainty and change.

This article will help you towards making positive changes in your spiritual-religious life.

There are three steps to so doing. (Please don’t skip the first step because I refer to it later on.)

An experiment to learn what change feels like
An explanation about why we don’t always rush to adopt change
A question of your changing needs


Interlace your fingers, one finger on top of the other.
Make a mental note which pinkie is on the bottom of the pile – either left or right.
Undo your hands and interlace your fingers with the opposite pinkie on the bottom.
That is change.
The only thing different is the order of your fingers.

Yet, for most people, this new way of having your hands feels awkward. Some people can only tolerate this awkward feeling for a very short amount of time before laughingly undoing their hands, stating, “That felt gross.”

No matter, let’s move on.


There are many reasons we don’t change.

The first two reasons not to change
There is nothing uncomfortable about holding your hands the way you first put your fingers together.

There are no compelling reasons to adopt the new position.

These are the first two, wonderful reasons to not change:

we do not experience enough discomfort with our current way of doing things
we are not compelled enough by the benefits of change

Please note that most marketing is targeted to the benefits of change and the detriments of not changing.

The second two reasons not to change

There are two additional reasons we often do not rush to change.

Holding our hands in the new position causes discomfort.

We were comfortable enough with the way we were doing things.

These are the second two, wonderful reasons to not change:
adopting change brings new difficulties
we like the way we do things

In summary, often we decide not to change because
the benefits of changing aren’t compelling
the potential detriments of changing are scary
the benefits of not changing are compelling
the detriments of not changing aren’t scary enough


Statistically, most spiritual-religious growth (regarding theology and our understanding of reality) happens when tragedy forces a re-contemplation of what had, until that time, been comfortable for us. That is to say, most people do not willingly enter into a process to re-think how they view the world. It is only when the world seems to be turned on its head that change is needed. In other words, the change is often triggered when the detriment of not changing is too high or when reality no longer seems comfortable.

I would posit that you believe yourself comfy enough in your current spiritual-religious life.

Or, perhaps, you are overdue for a change.

Ask yourself the following questions with regard to your spiritual-religious-faith life:

Do you have enough compassion?
Are you mindful to a degree you find appropriate?
Do you find meaning in your life?
Are you angered for reasons that no longer make sense to you?
Do you easily accept reality as it is and easily accept love?
With regard to your spiritual-religious life, you needn’t change if:
the benefits of changing aren’t compelling
the potential detriments of changing are scary
the benefits of not changing are compelling
the detriments of not changing aren’t scary enough

So, let me ask you?
Are the benefits of changing compelling?
Do you see that you could benefit from more compassion, less anger, or more love?

Are the potential detriments of changing overwhelming?
Can you imagine that the discomfort of being spiritually whole won’t be problematic? Might the potential undesirable effects of becoming a newer version of you not terrify?

Are the benefits of not changing compelling?
Is the comfy way you have of seeing and being in the world – the things you would have to give up if you made a change – worth holding onto? Are you so insistent that you are right that you don’t allow yourself to wonder otherwise?

Are the detriments of not changing motivating enough?
Do you suspect that if you continue to do things the way you are doing them, your suffering will cause your continued hardship or even increase your discomfort?

I would love to talk with you about these four change quadrants with regard to your spiritual-religious life. In my experience, the benefits of changing one’s spiritual-religious-faith life mightily outweigh the detriments of not-changing and the potential detriments of the change.

With love,

Rabbi Brian

Visit Rabbi Brian’s website

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